Condoms are said to be the safest way of protecting sexually transmitted infections that comes next after abstaining, but have you ever experienced condom breakage while on a steamy session?

I mean, I met this guy at the garage, we talked a bit and at the end of it we exchanged numbers. At first, I thought of giving him those advertisement numbers that you see on the billboards, but then I thought why not? After all, maybe he will just call three times to the maximum and my guess was right, he went mute for a week. And then he called asking for a coffee date on the second week of which I agreed. It was one fine Wednesday after work. We met at a luxurious hotel, one that is not overcrowded, but I must confess I didn't enjoy my cup of coffee. First, he brought his friend as a tag on when I was expecting some private time with him since I knew nothing about him and I had googled some questions to ask on a date. And this guy -oh my! It's like he was there to approve of me in their life. He would comment on anything I said just to put me off. He even commented on how chilled I looked after riding on a motorcycle and he also noted I had tried to drill a hole on my belt since it was a bit bigger. The waiter came in between our conversations and took our order of which I asked for white coffee, although I prefer black to white. I also noticed some facial expressions that I couldn't read when the waiter took my order "black or white coffee madam?", and of course you've got my answer. Later I learned that they were strong believers of the seventh day Adventist church (SDA), when I ordered pork ribs for dinner.

"Have you ever experienced condom breakage while on a steamy session?"

After that incident of milk and pork, I didn't expect to hear from him anytime soon, but on one fine Sunday afternoon I received a call and I requested that he would like to take me out, of which he ended up at my place since I prefer being indoors on Sunday, you know, just to save energy for Monday. We talked a lot and watched some Netflix and enjoyed each other's company. The next day he came for dinner and being the adults we are we didn't beat around the bush. We talked of having an HIV test before engaging in any coitus activity of which we both agreed and even set the date because after all at one point, I had to tell him of my status, if sex was a subject. But away from sex, he was really a nice guy, the kind that clears the table and cleans the dishes willingly.

I had planned to review my status to a day before the test, but he passed by that day at around evening hours of which he said he was from a meeting just within and thought of saying hello. I didn't buy that, I knew he missed me, but one thing led to another and we found ourselves talking of a condom breakage in the middle of coitus. At first, I was so shocked that my eyes popped out, but I had to tell him of my HIV status so that he can seek medical help. I sent him a text after he had left and oh boy, he went nuts. I tried to explain that Undetectable =Untransmittable but he didn't want to hear any of that. Then I told him about post exposure prophylaxis and the next day he went to the hospital and got some. We talked for the whole of that month until he completed his prescription and tested negative, and from there we parted ways. His last words to me were: "if you ever need a loan, do call me". Meaning I should only call him for business.

"I tried to explain Undetectable equals Untransmittable but he didn't want to hear any of that."

From that day I have been thinking when is the right time to discuss your HIV status?Is it on the first date or does it depend on your openness? I also hope that one day people will have enough knowledge about Undetectable=Untransmittable to a point of trusting without condemning.