Trigger warning: This post deals with sexual assault and may be upsetting. Be kind to yourself and read this when you're ready.

I would love to introduce myself… but I cannot.

As a cis gendered woman living with HIV exploring my options to become a sex worker again, I would be putting myself at risk for criminalisation.

I live in Australia. I have access to ARVs. I am undetectable. But if I choose to go back to work in my state, I could go to jail and be dragged through mud in the media, stigmatized and criminalised for a virus I cannot pass on.

There is no known case in Australia of a sex worker transmitting HIV to a client through sex work. However, in some states, being an HIV-positive sex worker is a criminal offence. We may also be at risk of prosecution regarding HIV disclosure.

"Now, if I went to work in another state, I would be okay. Every state and territory in Australia has different laws, making it so hard, even for me as an Australian born person, to navigate these laws and keep myself out of the system.

In one state in this country, New South Wales, they have changed the laws: a person with a sexually transmissible disease is no longer required by law to disclose that they have the condition prior to sexual intercourse if they take reasonable precautions against transmitting the condition to others.

"There is no case in Australia of a sex worker transmitting HIV to a client."

‘Reasonable precautions’ is not defined in the Public Health Act, but New South Wales Health says this may include use of a condom or having an undetectable viral load resulting from effective antiretroviral therapy. When someone is undetectable, there is effectively no risk of sexually transmitting the virus to an HIV-negative partner. Finally, some laws are catching up to the science!.

I was involved in the sex industry from a young age. I started doing amateur photos, then porn. Then I started working in hotels as an escort. Becoming a sex worker was a positive experience.

The first time I ever had sex I was raped. And I was assaulted many times after that, having no agency over my body. It was like I had victim tattooed on my head and any predator could see that and use me how they wanted.

But becoming a sex worker changed all that. I did not start because I was a victim or because I was broken. I did it because I wanted to reclaim my body. I was young and beautiful. Soon I learnt that I was in control. I had agency. I chose whom I would see, how I would see them, and what I wanted. And I made them pay. A lot!

"Becoming a sex worker was a positive experience."

I felt like a goddess, strong and independent. It was not perfect, nothing is. But it was a good time in my life, until I was diagnosed with HIV. Now calm down! I did not acquire HIV from sex work.

So, fast-forward 10 years to today… I am facing a huge life shift again and I want to create a future for myself where I am in control.

However, navigating this space as a cis gendered woman living with HIV is new and uncertain. I have been in touch with some people I know that work in the industry and the national peer-led organisations. I have found out where sex workers are advertising. It’s now up to me to take the next step.

I have a few things I must sort out in my life before I make my decision. But I will be sure to keep you all in the loop.

Are there any other HIV positive sex workers reading this? I would love to hear about your experiences in the global context.